In 2007 Ben Vareen spoke at a luncheon I attended. We spoke briefly after his presentation and because our time was limited he asked me to send him a letter about my experiences. It is now 2010 and I am still working on getting back to doing what I enjoy. That is performing, whether it be singing, film, theatre or voice-over, I am totally "there" when I am doing something in the performance arts. I never heard back from Mr. Vareen, I had to send the letter through the public relations department at Independence First, so sometimes I wonder if it even went out. Because he was willing to share his experiences, the sparks that seemed as if they had been extinguished were reignited and once again I was encouraged to continue pursuing my dreams. Also, in reflecting on what he said to me, it reminded me how blessed I am. Isn't it funny that 3 years later I am still encouraged by this encounter? I hope that I can offer the same encouragement to someone else on their travels.
The following is the letter I wrote:
"Dear Mr. Vareen,
I cannot even begin to convey how much your presentation at the Power Luncheon for Independence First meant to me. Thank you, thank you, and thank you!!! You reminded me of what my hearts desire is and your willingness to share your struggles and seeing your ability to rise above them has given me the courage to try harder to pursue my dreams.
After listening to you, and then when we had the chance to speak I was flooded with the remembrance of how much we (all humans) mean to each other. Your enthusiasm, energy and love took me back to the time when I was at The National Theatre Workshop for the Handicapped in Belfast Maine
Since that time and because of the faith and encouragement I received at The National Theatre Workshop of the Handicapped I have had the pleasure to perform in a number of capacities. (A story appeared in our local newspaper before I went to Belfast Maine however I am unable to link to it. I will scan it in when I can get to a quality scanner)
About 2 years ago I had taken ill, put on a lot of weight and just started feeling sorry for myself in general. Every day it seems as if my dream of being a performer moves further and further away. In the last 6-months I have attempted to take charge of life again but that has been difficult. I went to a doctor about my weight and all he said was I needed a bigger wheelchair (I told him I needed a smaller butt!!). The hospital that I go to only has one scale I can use to get weighed, and perhaps I am too sensitive however these situations make me feel like I don’t count, that my value as a human being is somehow diminished.
I decided that I would try to encourage the goddess within by working on my outsides. I made an appointment at a day spa to have a body scrub (I had enquired and was assured that since the spa was part of the hospital that it was fully accessible). When I arrived for my appointment, I was denied services because staff was concerned about “working” with me and what would they do if something happened to me. This was very confusing to me as I have raised 3 children, gotten my education, work full time, have my own business (PJPortfolio which consists of Mary Kay Cosmetics and my film and print work) live independently and am able to give back to my community in various volunteer capacities. (PJPortfolio no longer exists, until I can get my health back my life consists of working and sleeping basically)
I tell you these things because of what you wrote to me. ”I’ll see you on the big stage. Life is Good!
Thank you!! Yes you will see me on the big stage and life truly is good because you see, I have 3 sons, I have an education, I have a job, I have my own business and I do live independently and am able to give back to my community. Thank you for reminding me of how fortunate I am! Please come back to Milwaukee
Sincerely,"
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