Welcome to my world!

I went shopping yesterday.  Shopping for me is a bit different than it is for many people.  I put the basket on my lap and then try to get what I can in the basket.  Sometimes I fill a basket, take it to a closed checkout lane; empty the basket and continue shopping and emptying the basket until I am through.  That works pretty well unless an over zealous stock person restocks my food, which has happened more than once.

Anyway this is a story about my shopping trip yesterday.  My first stop was to get my hair washed at the salon in the shopping center then to Pick N Save.  I got my groceries and asked the attendant to please go grab me a nice big watermelon.. which he did.  I then got back into the car and headed to the Outpost grocery store, they sell organic food there.  Got my grass fed beef and all the fresh vegetables that I need to by organically, then headed home.  I had about 5 trips from the underground parking to my apartment.  The first bag contained a 2 liter bottle of Diet Coke (still have not been able to totally break myself of the diet soda habit) put the soda on the counter next to the refrigerator.  Next trip to the van, I thought, I am going to try and carry a bit more so I don't have to make so many trips.  I put the watermelon on my lap and then a bag of groceries on top and proceeded to carry them upstairs to my apartment.  Instead of setting the bag on the floor and putting the watermelon on the counter, I tried putting some groceries away first.  While I was doing that the watermelon slipped off my lap onto the floor.

It was about 9 pm so I called the only neighbor I knew to ask her to come and pick up the watermelon for me because I could not leave it on the floor.  She was not home.  So I tried wedging my foot rest under the melon, it was too big and that did not work.  Then I tried using my transfer board to get it under the melon and perhaps wiggle it up the wall to where I could grab it...that didn't work.  I didn't want to call my son and have him drive over just to pick up a melon, so I thought.."there has to be someone still up on a Saturday night in this building", and proceeded to push up and down the hallways on three floors listening for signs of life from each apartment.  There was none to be found.  Got back to my kitchen and the errant melon at about 9:45 pm.  Thought to myself, "OK, if I can't pick up a whole melon, perhaps if I get the big knife and cut it in half I will be able to pierce it with the knife and get it off the floor that way.  So, here I am at 10 pm, hacking away at this poor melon on my floor, juice going everywhere.  I got it cut in half and then pierced the half with the knife and picked it up...up...crap..the melon was starting to slip off the knife!  I quickly grabbed the melon half with one hand and the knife flung backward right into the Coke bottle piercing it and causing a flood of soda to squirt out of the bottle onto my refrigerator, all over my pictures, microwave, and me.  I quickly set the melon half on the other counter and grabbed the bottle and put it into the sink. I was not a happy camper, f bombs were dropped.  The next half of melon was too heavy to pick up that way so I wound up cutting it in half again.  Washed the melon off and cut it up and put it in the refrigerator.

Today as I think about this I am not frustrated...in fact I find it hysterical.  It probably looked like a one man version of the Keystone Cops in my kitchen!!!   Its amazing the change in perspective when I allow myself a little time to compose myself and look at situations from a calmer perspective.